May 4, 2013
BEING BIRACIAL IN IRINGA TOWN
It was the stares that made me uncomfortable the most. The wide open stares from a collected number of people. The silence was the worst, it made me feel like I have done something wrong, or I was wrong. I would walk past them and as soon as I neared whispers of conversation they would slam down into oblivious silence. A deathly quiet, it’s only the hens that would pay no heed to me.
I clutch my Mp3 player and fasten headphones tighter all the while fighting the urge to shrink into my body. I would instead stretch out and force a smile on my face to all that I felt drill those penetrating eyes on me. I want to badly scream out “what!” but I knew it won’t make a difference I was the “what” to be more precise the “what are you”.
(Picture from Google image-Mixed kids)
“What’s your name?” I asked, of course I knew his name, I have noticed him like everyone else but all the same its necessary to validate. At 18 years of age He looked nervous, and if I am not mistaken uncomfortable despite the gentle greenery surroundings us and the best weather in Iringa town so far.
“I’m Kay” he replies after what seem like a full minuet has passes by. He visibly tried to relax; I smiled my special smile to let him know he can feel at home with me, he can feel comfortable. Visually he was attractive, cute and handsome come to mind when you take in the lightly tanned skin, boyish body, dark chocolate eyes and thick dark hair. He looked Arab to me, and that was my mistake, he was anything but. He comes off as nervous and second guessing himself, but then again it’s probably the first time a journalist is interviewing him, also a first time that he now has to face his genetic makeup and scrutinize aspects that make him as he is and reasons behind behaviours of others around him.
I come from the ‘sena’ tribe…like my mum. In Malawi we didn’t go by tribe but then again I was brought up as a town boy. I’m mixed race, I’m actually Chinese, and my full name is Chinese because my dad’s from china.
I have lived in Malawi for 13 years, I was born in Mbeya but raised in Malawi, and funny thing is I am not fluent in Swahili. He laughs and his eyes crinkle up into a slanted shape.
Primary and secondary school for me it was mixed, more coloured than black, it varied though. I wasn’t bullied but I did have to fit in…funny thing is with the blacks. Coloured people acted the way I didn’t like…they acted too cool… a bit much.
In Tanzania normally when I meet people I don’t give out a good impression because I am not that confident but my cousin is my voice. Sometimes in Tanzania people don’t understand the difference between white people and Arab people or that white people are just friends to us. One time there was this small car accident, we tried to help the passenger out and one of the local people gave out to us telling us that “just because your with white friends doesn’t mean you know everything”.
“you know” he looked at me in earnest, “today is April 22n’d my mum passed away 3 years ago”. I gave him my condolences. “ So I associate with my dad’s side now but I haven’t met his side of the family”. His thoughts looked distant and I had an idea of why he hasn’t”.
“How do you think people in Tanzania see you?” I asked.
I never really thought about it. Now that you have mentioned it in 1st semester we had to form a group for an assignment. I, my cousin and sister automatically came together along with another black student. We all got along in the group but other groups thought we have high status; they didn’t like associating with us and believed that we didn’t like to associate with them. Local people will normally not talk to me, maybe one or two. He shrugged and I paused briefly to take in his words before I proceeded with the next question.
“How do you feel about some mixed race people calling themselves the third race?”
I think it’s just more understandable being one race or other…being third race some people feel like they don’t belong…
He smiled and almost laughed at my next question, I had to draw on my serious mask least I be distracted by his visible charming smile.
I am dating a dutch girl currently. Sometimes she perceives Africa as not a safe place but she’s dating a coloured. I think she’s ok with dating a coloured but not a black person. I am the second coloured guy she’s dated. For me it’s the first time I have actually dated a white girl and I don’t think there’s any difference just skin tone.
I think people need to understand that everybody is different accept for who they are. They shouldn’t feel the pressure to fit in because they are not the same as everybody.
I nodded my head in agreement and thanked him for opening up to me. We parted ways with smiles and laughter. To him, I would like to believe he felt great about talking about parts of his life to someone who could relate. To me, his experience where too close for comfort and only made me search for more understanding.
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Personally I feel we are the same, I also feel that we are equal but they feel that they are higher than us. I basically see them ordinary despite the fact that they are racist to us. When I was studying my O’Levels, mixed race students who were mixed with Indian, arab or white wouldn’t speak to us, even a greeting! This went on from 1st year to 4th year.
I can’t marry a mixed race woman, the life I live will be hard on her, she may not accept my people as easily as she accepts me. Dating a mixed race person…I don’t mind but never marry.
Mixed race people see themselves superior and you will most likely find them in beautiful environments but together with the locals?…no. in my work, its compulsory to charge hem high, they appear like they have money, the features alone will make me charge them differently.
High percentages of people here have the same view as me. Often I think they would date the other side of their mixture and not the African side, this is because of their environment.
For me a black person is defined black due to his origin. Black are from Africa and even them, they are black.
22 year old student Patricia Placid Mkude a third generation, grandchild of a mixed grandfather (Indian and hehe tribe) had mixed feelings about being mixed. She describes herself as belonging to the lugulu tribe despite the obviously long elongated structure of her face, she reminded me of the RnB singer Ciara.
Coloured is the right term to call people of mixed race…because it’s a mixture of race. I wouldn’t call myself coloured, I define my race as the colour of my parents.
Sometimes I feel like I was born in Tanzania but by mistake. I would sometimes daydream of being born in a place like…America. People don’t get me here, they don’t get my life style. The society I am in judge me badly just because I can speak English better. A lot of people throughout my child hood and even now tell me they don’t think I’m African, they tell me “the first time we saw you in university we thought your foreigner”. Hell! The would even call me ‘Alshabab’ after the Somali terrorists.
Personally I believe I will fit in much better in an American society, they understand me more and will see me ordinary since they have a large mixed race people there. This feeling comes from the people around me here.
I would say I am more attached to my mum’s side. I don’t believe my dad’s side like me that much. In my mum’s since they are al a mixture I look and am taken as ordinary, they make me feel I have a family.
Most people view me probably as stuck up…show off…high maintenance and as a coconut, meaning brown on the outside but white on the inside. And this makes it so hard for me to socialise, I lose confidence.
I don’t accept the term of myself being coloured, or mixed race, I believe that’s reserved for people who have half of each race.
On the dating department I would honestly say I’ve got an advantage. Most of the guys love my facial structure. Personally I stopped dating black, I prefer light skinned men. I just don’t feel accepted here especially with the really dark skinned Africans.
23 year old Melanie Lameck, a student belonging to luo tribe in Kenya had an astonishing view. Her family has already intermarried with other races, she also had the advantage of living in England for 10 years.
My nephew and nieces and friends are mixed, I personally find them the same as everybody else. This article your writing, I feel it kinda lets you know more about biracial people, how they feel about themselves, their behaviours, attitudes and as a person.
Personally I want my child to be mixed. Mixed race kids are cute! Definitely more than black…and the hair is great. I wouldn’t treat them any different just because they are mixed, I see them ass ordinary people.
I sure wouldn’t mind dating mixed race an even marrying one if I am lucky, their physical appearance is more attractive and I believe it will be fun to explore something new other than within your race.
I think that mixed race people see themselves as black. Most of them want to be black; they don’t like to accept their other mix. Society here though sees them as coloured, no belonging. If I ever get blessed with mixed kids, I want them to know the origin of both their race.
I don’t like the way society separate them and judge them as being mixed. Were ever they pass they would be called ‘vyo shombe’, they are categorised as coloured and nothing else. Mixed race people are viewed as having attitude, aggressive and carrying the baggage of two races.
Most mixed race people I see would date different races, they prefare to date other races than their own mix race people. But I have notice that mixed race female are more willing to date their white mixture and the mixed race men prefer black mixture.
I personally believe the colour and feature of a person defines them as black, not the culture. I would say mixed race people of black and other rage origin aren’t fully black but they have an advantage of fitting in both sides.
The biggest problem for them is being accepted day to day.
Hairlicious- Proudly African/Sigh (Indian)
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